Thursday, May 18, 2006

response to Bob.

Anonymous said...

I'm one of your "fans," though haven't visited in a while--so I was shocked to see your sad news. I'm surprised you're not returning in August--can you explain? You've come so far. Do you not want to be a CRNA anymore? It's hard to imagine such a driven student get 1/2 way through school, get a C, and give up. How are you viewing this set-back in the big picture of your future? Remember, it's not what happens to you, but how you react to what happens to you. Good luck, wherever you go!

Bob


Here are you answers, Bob, and anyone else who is interested.
First and foremost, my husband and marriage are first priority for me. From August to December, I spent time 7 hours from home and my husband. From January to May, I was at home, but my mind was not on my husband, it was on school. The fall semester and being away from my husband and home was the hardest thing I have ever done, EVER. My husband means the world to me. He keeps me grounded and keeps me striving to be my best. He supports me through it all, even through a C grade and 'change in plans'. I was finishing up the first 1/3 of the anesthesia program. I would restart from ground zero by returning in August. My clinical site would be up in the air until this time next year. Do I still want to be an anesthetist? Yes. But I want to be a wife to my husband and best friend first and foremost. If the opportunity arises, I will seek my goal again. As far as a set-back in the future. I am still a registered nurse. Jobs are plentiful. It's just a {change in plans}

Jennie

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I just want you to know that I admire you and wish you the best of luck in the future- whatever you decide.

Monique

Anonymous said...

Jennie,
please do not take this wrong. I have been a staunch supporter and reader from the get go. But I must comment on this.
In your 'response to bob' entry you said that, "my husband means the world to me...he keeps me striving to be my best.." if you truly seek out what your heart wants and you decide that you truly want to be a CRNA, do not use your husband as an excuse not to. If you look in heart and realize that it is not a sacrifice you want to make and you would rather do something different, then do that; again do not use your hubby as an excuse or reason. he seems like a wonderful person, one whom you have described as your best friend. As your best friend I am sure that he would also encourage you to follow YOUR heart. If you don't do something b/c of him, maybe not now, but sometime later in life, you would resent him for an opportunity lost.
Again, I am not trying to be assy or critical. Just offering a different perspective. I don't care what you choose to do, (as long as you keep blogging--ha ha), but do it for YOU. do it b/c it is what your heart wants.
Keep hanging in there and please believe I am a supporter.
Karen

{change in plans} said...

Karen,
I appreciate your perspective. I am not using my husband as an excuse, rather a reason to not distance ourselves from each other again. As of now, our plan is to move once he finds a new job. I do not have a deadline as to when I could not return to the same program, nor am I prevented from applying to a different program (though I doubt that's all that easy to be accepted to another program). Hey, as long as you don't cut me down, I'm fine with perspective. I'm seeing this from my side, rather than reading from an outsiders view.
Jennie

Anonymous said...

No, I would never intend to cut you down. I have been cut down by many others in my life and I hate that feeling...so that what was not my intent. just wanted to offer a different view and I am glad that you didn't take it wrong. I do hope you find something that your heart enjoys-even if it scrapbooking and being a stay-at-home wife and chef (ohhh could Iron Chef be on your agenda??) as long as you are happy.
Hang in there, be strong and most importantly--be happy.
Karen

Hollye said...

Jennie-

Please email me. hollyecross@comcast.net I want us to make plans to meet up in Memphis before you find a job and then aren't able to!

Anonymous said...

Jennie, thanks for your response. My wife is my solid support for pursuing nursing as a 2nd career and anesthesia in the next few years, so I can understand your consideration for your husband. If your marriage is in jeopardy or is generally unhealthy, I understand. However, I do agree with Karen. If your marriage is healthy and your husband supports whatever decision you make, then you shouldn't use it as a reason to not pursue your goal of CRNA. Even if you have to repeat every anesthesia course, you are NOT starting at ground zero. Every day you put off anesthesia school is another day you are forgetting all that you've learned. You have so much knowledge gained, I can hardly imagine! Your situation is your own and no one can make decisions for you--like Karen said, your happiness is what's most important. What I read between your lines though, is that you're done with anesthesia altogether. More than your setback, this is what I see as the saddest part of the story. You have a lot to offer.

Bob

{change in plans} said...

Bob,
Thanks for your comment. I have a wonderful marriage, but it's been a stressful year. More stressful than you can ever imagine. I have not written anesthesia out for good, just letting things settle. I KNOW I would make a great CRNA, but my instructor's sadistic exams and my brain had other plans for me, unfortunately.
Jennie